Just who will I be?

I'm now 42 and I'm an ugly exerciser.

On my birthday I went to the gym. I've been doing interval training and vacillate between the elliptical (which I'm learning to really like), the bike (which I, frankly, can't stand) and the treadmill (which is my old friend).

I am dressed in my mom's sweatpants which are cropped and a nod to the 80F temperature out today, my husband's XXL "Chief's" grey T-shirt and my own white and pink Finest Invitations hat. Runway bound, I am not. I have on no makeup and when I glance in the mirror to my right, I see that my black sweatpants have a white smear on the side. "Maybe from the cool whip last night...?" I wonder and keep walking.

About 22 minutes into my program, my complete opposite commandeers the treadmill next to me. She's everything I'm not. She's petite, her dark curly hair is orderly and she proceeds to crank that baby up to 6.5 and starts to run. She doesn't sweat, she glistens. For God's sake, she even brought her own towel.

For years, I have compared myself to others. And frequently, I wind up falling short. My girlfriend in TC has her house pulled together, my engineer friend cooks homemade meals for her family every night, my sister is paid thousands to speak for an hour. I rarely look at the whole picture when comparing. I just pull out those things that I fall short on and look at those.

I know this about myself.

And here, at the brand new age of 42, I'm doing it again. Comparing myself to this woman on the neighboring treadmill and coming up short.

"I'm sick of this" I think.

"I am my own woman" I say to myself.

"I have lots of great qualities" I think encouragingly.

"It doesn't have to be a contest all the time!" I plead with myself.

"You are on the treadmill"

"You are working out!"

"You are a great person!"

I am mollified and encouraged. I no longer glance over at her speed, or her time. I am content with my own workout, my own image, my own life.

I smile.

And in the next second, my treadmill neighbor picks up her towel and honkingly blows her nose in it.

I chuckle to myself and think "I win".

Sunny thoughts

It was cloudy and rainy and, franky, pretty gross out yesterday. But you know what I got to thinking? It was actually sunny out. Really, it was. Just not where I could see it.

Just because it was rainy didn't mean the sun wasn't still shining...there was just a huge layer of clouds between the sun and me.

It felt a little less gross after that. And a little less lonely.

Help, I need someone

Ok, I don't get it. What is WITH customer service people these days. I mean really. I hate to sound like my mother (who frequently bemoans her residence in Customer Service Hell) but honestly.

People, it's very simple: MAKE IT EASY FOR PEOPLE TO DO BUSINESS WITH YOU.

That's it.

Well, one other thing: Quit acting like the customer is stupid. Frankly, you're right. One of us doesn't get it...

Grrr...

Great lesons in film...er...lessons

National Treasure is on. I love that movie. My husband teases me that I watch it so much. The other day I was watching it in the bedroom.

"Why do you like that movie so much?", he came in and asked.

"It's a mystery!", I enthusiastically replied.

"Not by now it's not." he responded dryly.

The man has a point.

Regardless, I love the movie. Today, for the first time, I logged on and checked out the Declaration of Independence. Maybe voting has put me in a patriotic state of mind...but I wanted to see for myself what the document said.

It is very cool. And if you haven't read it since the 3rd grade (like me), then go find it now and read it again.

And here's something I realy didn't know... there's a Rough Draft. Really. I was shocked. I don't know why... I guess I just thought it is such a great document that it just wrote itself.

Which is just silly.

But, it's a great lesson for me. Great documents don't just happen without re-writes, revisions and re-do's so why do I think great lives just happen.

I'm going to do more that I'm not certain about. I'm going to stop waiting for the perfect word, perfect plans. I'm going to get it down on paper, start doing it. Then revise it. Lots of things get edited. Few things are perfect the first go-around.

What a great lesson. Now I ask you? What's not to love about that movie?

Another reflection

There's a pattern in my life. Maybe in yours too. I seem to run into some difficult people. I mean just those types that can push my buttons. WHAMMO! Zero to pissed off in six seconds.

I made a list today of the names. It stretches back to 1990. Geepers that's a list. Funny thing is...they ARE all difficult people. Even the most objective person would say "Yep, that guy/gal's a jerk. No doubt about it." There are men and women on there, young, old...a real all inclusive list. No discriminating. Was there a theme? Yeah, I guess. They all didn't understand or appreciate something they had. They should have gotten a point, figured something out, communicated better...

One lady just didn't understand business and would frequently screw up plans we would make;

One guy had to do my review, this would have been a boss I once had, and what a joke. I was ticked before the meeting. He didn't have a clue how to lead, let alone figure out if I knew what I was doing;

This other guy used to write the most arrogant emails. Really, really arrogant. The kind that just come right off the screen, grabs your guts and starts knot-tying. Man, I hated that guy.

You've probably got a similar list. Don't we all have people in our lives that are tough to deal with? So why am I so surprised when I run into "these kind of people". They are out there. We all know they're out there. Easy to spot.

I was sitting at a dinner one time with clients. It was a nice dinner. Upscale restaurant, lots of utensils all with special uses, linen napkins... A lady in the next room over caught my eye. She had long curly hair, like me. Sitting at a table full of suits, like me. What it took a few seconds to figure out was, it was me. Just a reflection from the mirror. An image bouncing back at me. Unrecognizable at first. But, clearly me. Once I took a minute I could recognize myself in a sea of others.

I'm looking at this list and thinking about that dinner and, man, my stomach is really in knots now.

This is nuts

I read an article today about blame. It said the smart person looks at the situation and rather than figuring out who to blame says "What needs to be done?" And then, of course, does that rather than standing around deciding who's at fault.

We had to cut down a tree in my backyard this week. It seemed like the right thing to do. It being dead and all. And while we were at it, we took advantage of having 8 guys out here to go ahead and take down the GIGANTORE cottonwood tree (read:weed) that had overcome most of the yard.

These cottonwoods are not really trees as explained to me by an arborist in a wife-beater t-shirt but rather weeds left alone grown out of control. This is a subject for another post for sure.

It seemed like the right thing to do.

It causes a bunch of cottony like bunk twice a year to get everywhere (typically right after we wash the outside of the house and all the windows);
It has more leaves then are physically rake-able in one afternoon;
I could go on and on... It just didn't seem smart letting this treeweed continue to grow and overtake who knows how much more of our yard.

So we had them take it down.

This morning there are two squirrels sitting on our fence looking at where the tree used to be. I am sick. They look like they are thinking "What happened to our tree?" "Where is our home, our food for the winter?" "Whose idea was this?!?"

In reality, I imagine they are not thinking this at all. They aren't like humans. They are probably resting while rebuilding their next home. They do what good, mature humans do. They aren't looking for someone to blame. They are seeing what needs to be done and doing it.

It still makes me sick, though and as I stare out at the squirrels I can't believe I let my husband and that stupid tree guy talk me into this.

Not same. Same, same.

A very long time ago, another life really, I was sitting across a long mahogany conference room table from a very short Japanese man having a disagreement. My company was making a product for this client out of a "new" material which wasn't really new it just had a new name.

I had affidavits from the vendor stating it was the same material.
I had data from manufacturing stating it was the same material.
I had MSDS sheets to prove it was the same material.
We even ran tests on the finished product to show it was the same material.

After all my documentation and dialog (actually monologue would be more appropriate) with this client, he repeated this statement: "Not same".

I wish you could hear me say it...or better yet, have heard him say it. He was unconvinced. I had the data. Let's face it. Everything proved to him that it was the same material. It didn't matter. In his mind and out loud he would pronounce "Not same" after every point I made. I would shake my head, smile and say "No, sir...same, same." He disagreed. Every. time. And if you know me, you know this went on for some time.

I voted today. I stood in line with many, many people in my neighborhood...very few of them I even knew. The line went down the sidewalk, turned, down the other sidewalk, down the school drive, down the road and on and on. It was awesome. What a turnout.

Voting is just a cool thing. I didn't always think so. If you can't bring yourself to thank George W. for anything else, maybe you can thank him for waking up so many to the absolutely coolness that we have the privilege and responsibility to vote.

I stood in line with a lady who looked nothing like me. I could infer from her comments that we had very different lifestyles, different outlooks and we were definitely voting differently. Today there will be short, tall, fat, skinny, black, white, young, old, Democrat and Republican standing in line together. But despite all that evidence, I look at Americans voting today in the most amazing country on earth and declare "Same, same." Not so very different at all.

Dog days of autumn

When my older dog accidently wipes out in a puddle of her own urine on the wood floors at my house I stay calm and soothingly tell her it's okay.

So the next time I start to berate myself for the mess in my office, I'm going to pretend I'm a dog.

If I only were a noun...

I want to write a book. Not any book..well, yes, almost any book will do. It's something I've been wrestling with lately. Do I want to write a book OR is it more accurate to say I want to HAVE WRITTEN a book.

I think I'm more of a noun than a verb person.

I would rather be an author than write a book.
I would rather be a thin person than work at getting healthy.
I would rather have a house that is decorated and clean and organized rather than decorate, clean and organize.
I would rather be the owner of a successful and thriving business than call clients, write proposals and do my bookkeeping.

Given that, one would think I'd have an easier time accepting my worth for what I am rather than what I do.

Wedding Preparation Hint

Before I meet with a bride about their wedding invitations, I always like to ask about her budget. It's easy to devise a wedding budget these days. Lots of web sites out there to help you.

Typically, a bride can budget 3-5% for her wedding stationery. This would include the wedding invitations and accessory cards, as well as stationery for the receptions such as place cards, menu cards, etc.

Finally Loving Yourself - FLY

Have you heard of Flylady? I love her.

Here's a great quote (with a little paraphrasing) from one of her recent newsletters. I encourage anyone who has any thoughts of defeat, frustration, all or nothing thinking to check her out: flylady.net

Applying her advice has made my life (and that of my family) so much better.

"We all have our own independence day. We don't just wake up one morning and we are free of the stress that is holding us in bondage.

We have to declare at least to ourselves that we don't want to live this way another day and set out on our journey to find the peace that we so deserve.
We have to go through the struggles to feel the value in what we are doing.

This is why it is so important for us to be a part of the independence process! We have to be the one taking charge of our lives."

Happy Independence Day to our country, to you and to me.

Conserving energy

There are times when it is good to conserve energy. Here are some tips for conserving energy and money:

1. Turn off the lights when you leave the room.
2. Turn off your computer when you aren't using it.
3. Use reusable bags at the grocery store.
4. Don't run the dishwasher unit it is full.

But don't conserve energy in your friendships. Take the time to call, take the time to write, take the time to pen a letter, lick a stamp and make somebody's day brighter with a hand-written note.

Sometimes expending energy is even better.

Wedding Accessories

"What I need to find is one place where I can just get everything!" - Man E. Brides

Look no further, ladies! There are guest books, pens, garters, flower girl baskets, ring bearer pillows, T shirts, honeymoon accessories, napkins, unity candles, tapers, memorial candles and more!

For a wonderful selection at terrific prices, click here and find that one place!

Winter Wonderland!

Are you getting ready to plan your dream winter wedding?

There is something so beautiful about being married in the winter: candles, evergreens...the whole coziness and warmth of the season lend themselves beautifully to create a wedding event to remember.

Here's a lovely invitation you may want to consider to set the tone for your Winter Wedding!

Children's stationery

I think it is important for children to learn to communicate their thanks in writing at an early age. There are so many cute products out there.

Check out our company store for more links.

I have several hand written notes from my dad. He passed away many, many years ago. But it is great for me to have his thoughts and feelings down on paper in his own handwriting. Not some font that someone chose or even that he might have chosen himself.

But his handwriting.

Get the kids writing! You will cherish the memories later.

Customer service pledge

Award winning invitations are nothing without superior, no excuses, over-the-top, knock-your-socks-off customer service.

And that is what we are all about at Stationery Express.

We want you, I want you, to be completely thrilled with the product and the service that you receive from us.

We want to be a highlight in your event planning.

Update

A funny thing happened on my way to the last post... things got busy! I'm back now and anxious to share some more thoughts with you.

Weddings...ahhh.. is there anything better? All that excitement: the perfect dress, the just-had-to-have cake, the flowers which will be just right... It is such a fun, fun time.

If you need any help at all in ordering the invitations, just click on the link at the right or send me an email: sales@finestinvitations.com.

Many times I am asked: "How much should my invitations cost?". There are lots of estimates out there. I think a good one is 3% of your wedding budget. So, if your wedding budget is $20,000, plan on $600 for your wedding stationery.

The important thing is to know that there are TONS of choices out there for every price range. You can have really gorgeous invitations that will make a big impact on your guests and not break your budget!